Author: songofmary

LOVE Church and the Trinity~

Originally posted on June 29, 2013

I am led today to reinfuse Christianity with God’s Word and Holy Spirit which He has spoken into me.  I am displeased, and I believe God is too, with most current religions and church doctrine, one of the most heretical being the Christian church itself in how it worships Jesus as God, and makes graven images to him (crucifixes, etc.), and does not advocate following all God’s Law.

God has revealed to me physically and in my spirit that this worshiping Jesus is serious idolatry and violates the first two commandments.  And that those He chooses to follow Him, need to learn and understand all His commandments, statutes, and judgments as the One and Only Holy Law for man.  Not in order to limit man, but in order to lift him up and grace his life with abundance, which God longs to give us!

Jesus never commanded his disciples to worship Him. Indeed in Satan’s presence, He admonished anyone who would worship anyone but the Father:

Jesus said to him, “Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God and serve him only.’” ~Matthew 4:10

Some claim that because Jesus did command to be honored in John chapter 5, that He is implying here that He should be worshiped. But the Greek word for honored in this text is not among the numerous Greek words used to denote worship in the New Testament. In fact, the Greek word used here for honor is ‘timao’, Strong’s entry 5091, which is used also in the context of “Honor they father and thy mother”. So to be more precise, Jesus is relating the concept that He most certainly deserves honor, as one is also called to honor their parents, not that He deserves to be worshiped.

In addition, the Father judges no one. Instead, he has given the Son absolute authority to judge, so that everyone will honor the Son, just as they honor the Father. Anyone who does not honor the Son is certainly not honoring the Father who sent him. ~John 5:22-23

Another place people claim that Jesus allows for worship of Himself is when Doubting Thomas comes to believe that Jesus is the Resurrected One in the Upper Room and exclaims, “My Lord and my God!” (John 20:28) to which Jesus replied, “You believe because you have seen me. Blessed are those who believe without seeing me.” (John 20:29). This simple phrase my Lord and my God (God here is the Greek Kyrios) could be Thomas addressing both Jesus as Lord and Father God in this exclamation, or Thomas could be referring to his understanding that Jesus is the Kyrios or Messiah who is indeed risen again, and is God the Son. But it doesn’t mean Thomas was worshiping Jesus in this scene, only recognizing His resurrection.

Another argument for worshiping Jesus is that since He acknowledged He had the power to forgive sins–which was a Godly task–that He has the authority of God and as such should be worshiped as God. However, this is a fallacy that says by what Jesus’ actions are, makes Him worthy of being worshiped. This is not how it works. We worship God alone because He is the sovereign GOD, El Shaddai, not because of what He does but who He IS. In the same chapter of John where Thomas became a believer, Jesus breathed on them and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive anyone’s sins, they are forgiven. If you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven.” (John 20:22-23). So here Jesus is clearly giving power, through the Holy Spirit, for believers to forgive sins also, but we know that believers are not to be worshiped. 

We are called to be thankful to the depths of our soul for Jesus’ sacrifice for us, redeeming us unto our Father, and making those who accept Him born again in the Spirit, and able to have eternal salvation.  Jesus only has the power and authority to judge and to bridge the chasm between us and God. He alone was able to ensure we are able to receive the Holy Spirit inside of us.

BUT: John 9:38 Yes, Lord, I believe!” the man said. And he worshiped Jesus. also, hebrews 1:6And when he brought his supreme[c] Son into the world, God said,[d]

“Let all of God’s angels worship him.”[e]

But we should offer worship alone to God the Father, Almighty ALHYM.

Failure to Thrive~

Failure to Thrive~

Originally posted on March 8, 2013

I have failure to thrive. Except I’m gaining weight, instead of losing it.

Humanity holds no meaning for me.

I want to put in my notice.

I want to go where the sparkles are…

Breaking Free~

Originally posted on January 31, 2013

I just started this new bible study with Beth Moore.

I feel my strongholds and want to lay them down; give them up to the Lord.  Lord help me to do that.

Otherwise, I’m feeling a strong urge to do my hair, and put on lots of sparkly jewelry.  😀

My Love for Yeshu’a: Making a Protestant Prayer Rosary

Originally posted on November 10, 2012

Rosary means ‘crown of roses‘, and that is what I’d like to offer Christ to replace his crown of thorns he suffered for me and all of us on that cross so many years ago.  I know the rosary was originally created to offer prayer by Catholic monks, but it is a good practice and reminder to pray daily and devote thoughtful presence to God and His Divinity.

I am not Catholic, but since my conversion to Christ and becoming coram Deo (before God), I have longed to wear a rosary, with beads representing prayers and praise, and so that I might have a constant remembrance to pray often.

I also would like to proclaim my faith to others so that they might come to know the saving and healing love of God as I have.  I think for the beads I will use something like this, because I absolutely love mother of pearl.  And silver.

I also like the idea of making these for friends, kids, and maybe even soldiers oversees (sent with psalms written by the warrior David perhaps?) to offer comfort and guidance in combat.

My 44th birthday is coming up and I think it fitting that for this master birthday, I am renewing my faith in God the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, though I am sorry that it has taken me so long to do so.

Dear God, I love and worship You in all Your forms.  Lavish me with Your love and Your Light and Your truth.  That is all I want and need.  Now and forever.~~<3

And here is my completed rosary~

Image

Conversations with God

Originally posted on January 15, 2013

~Polytheism is monotheism. God’s purpose is to inject soul into every thing in the universe.* Man gleans this and calls this gods. In part man is right, because God is, in some degree, in every thing. But it all comes from the same place which is God. In man’s imperfection and humanness he worships these things as gods in and of themselves, not realizing that what he is doing is picking up on God-life. So men who do this are wise in some way because they can see the Godliness of and in things, but unwise because they do not understand it is from Abba>all from Abba, The Sovereign Father, and so they end up creating idols to worship.

*Our technology becoming part of us is one way inanimate objects will become alive. When they become alive, they will have the potential to either do evil or good. The choice is ours. We could have utopia [Heaven on earth]>where all objects were capable of expressing LOVE or we could have destruction.

~God does not desire us to judge at all! Gently rebuking your brother is a Christian notion. If we feel the need to talk down about or condemn our fellow man it is because we are not in tune enough with God and the Holy Spirit, and we are looking to ourselves and the world too much for answers. There should only be One Line between us and God. Everything else extending out from us should be simply loving energy. If this were to be the case, there would be no time nor inclination to judge or condemn. God wants this for us. He will judge, He will condemn in His own way and His own wisdom. God is great! He is the only Rebuker!

~Lust, addiction, and greed are all results of trying to (re)find Heaven. Somehow, some way, which God has not revealed to me yet [maybe through the ego this happens>our ego is the gatekeeper between our conscious and unconscious, and is charged with protecting our psyche, but can also become a barrier to growth, and if it becomes a barrier, our more superficial thoughts and feelings, driven by our blocked emotions, try to find joy and fulfillment in reality. But true fulfillment lies in unreality, or God], we become blocked from His love when we are hurt by others and we are turned to trying to find God in our flesh and our minds and even our hearts. But God is in our soul. We will not find Heaven outside of us. The way to Heaven lies within us, through the wisdom of our soul, and out unto God; which is the pulsing light force of the universe. Only through opening our soul and entering it will we find Heaven on earth.

~God simply revealed these things to me this morning because I was open and I asked. 0500.

My Conversion to God and Christianity

Originally posted on September 25, 2012

I was registering for some classes at junior college-I think it was the summer after my first year in college-and I heard someone say something publicly about religion–I can’t remember if he was for or against it–but it made me consciously consider, at that moment, the immaculate conception story and, because I really had no biblical knowledge to put that story in any sort of historical or spiritual perspective–because I had been raised as an Episcopalian and they do not ever crack open a bible that I have ever seen–I just could not make my young scientific self about to commence on quest for knowledge in the form of university and doctoral studies believe that God had impregnated Mary with a mini-God.  So it was just a downward spiral from there to atheism.  I don’t have any recollection of specific events that led to believing there is no God at all.  I think just as time passed, I was exposed to people and the world and sort of adhered to a ‘scientific’ explanation to explain things good enough for my fuzzy mind, as well as feeling like, at 19 and newly in love, that I could do anything on my own.  Actually, I was blessed from conception through childhood and adulthood by God and everything that came to me was by His Grace, but of course, like many young Americans I thought I was making it all happen because I was that good.

I made choices about a decade into my relationship with my husband that were lustfully derived and driven.  This, I now know, started the beginning of the end of “us.”  That bible verse in James that speaks about desire giving birth to sin giving birth to death illustrates it exactly.  My desire literally gave birth to the death of my marriage.

At the same time my marriage was nearing its final throes, I met someone to whom I was severely attracted who mentioned the Lord’s name to me in passing.  It startled me.  But it planted a seed in my mind and heart for God.  As my life spiraled along on its path of evil inevitability, this seed for God grew in my mind and heart, until it finally sprouted about the same time my personal and emotional life hit a horrible nadir of despair.  I had come to acknowledge that God was really what I had for the last many years been calling The Universe (with its inherent energy and omniscience).  God was a difficult thing to accept because my mind had so clung to a false salvation dichotomy of self and science, with some new-age notion of the universe thrown in for good measure.  But God in his mercy for my mental upheaval, began revealing himself to me in beautiful and consequential ways, which reinforced my tender shoot of burgeoning faith as He beckoned me upward into his warmth and light.

About a year into my conversion to believing in God, opening to his word, and living a more Godly life, I accepted Christ back into my heart with the help of a dear friend.  He helped me to see that Christ was just God coming to earth to reveal himself to us on our terms.  Because I know that God can do anything, I can now believe the story of Yeshua, that he was persecuted because of our sins, died for man, and that he ascended into heaven to be with God.  I am thankful for his sacrifice and for bringing the word of God to life again.  And I am ever thankful, on an hourly basis, that God is present in my life, and loving me and guiding me on my perilous journey through this world.

Thank you so much, Lord, for your divine presence in my life; and for awakening mine heart unto you.  May you be in my life for evermore.  ❤

Saint Augustine’s Poem to God

Originally posted on September 11, 2012

Behold, thou wast within
and I was without,
and I sought thee out there;

And among the lovely things
that thou hast made,
unlovely that I am, I heedlessly rushed .

Thou wast with me, 
but I was not with thee.

These things kept me far from thee
(they that would not be, were they not in thee).

Thou didst call and cry aloud,
and didst force open my deafness.

Thou didst gleam and shine,
and didst chase away my blindness.

Thou didst breathe fragrant odors
and I drew in my breath;
and now I pant for thee.

I tasted,
and now I hunger and thirst.

Thou didst touch me, and I burned for thy peace.

In Latin:

Sero te amavi,
pulchritudo tam antiqua et tam nova,
sero te amavi!

et ecce intus eras
et ego foris,
et ibi te quaerebam,
et in ista formosa,
quae fecisti,
deformis inruebam.

mecum eras,
et tecum non eram.

ea me tenebant longe a te,
quae si in te non essent, non essent.

vocasti et clamasti
et rupisti surditatem meam:

coruscasti,
splenduisti et fugasti caecitatem meam:

fragrasti, et duxi spiritum,
et anhelo tibi,

gustavi
et esurio et sitio,

tetigisti me,
et exarsi in pacem tuam.

The Bible and Me: A Random Reading Book by Book

Originally posted on February 5, 2012

So, I never read the Bible growing up, as it seems like everybody else did.  I Tried.  But I never got very far.  And, yes, I tried starting at the New Testament and that didn’t help much either.  I just always found other ways to spend my time.  Indeed, I didn’t really read much for fun outside of school until I was a teenager, and then Zane Grey and Harlequin Romances beat out the Bible, I’m afraid.

My grandfather gave me this beautiful King James Version in 1976, and it is, as you can see, a special Bicentennial edition, bound in white leather?, and adorned with red and blue foil embossing, and gold leaf pages.  I adore it, and keep it by my bedside.  But in attempting to really read the Bible now, as I am poised on my precipice of change and heading into my new life, I found the KJV to be a bit too unwieldy for me to wade through, and therefore impractical, because I have to re-interpret so much of what I read, that I find myself not wanting to read it.

ø;

So I purchased at Wal-Mart the New International Version next to it in soft lavender leather with silver leaf pages–and just for Girls!–and I find it quite enjoyable to read, and pick it up at least a couple times per week. 

Update: I ended up giving this girl bible to my daughter, Meghan ❤

God’s Love

Originally posted on June 17, 2011

I knew that going camping on my own was something that I needed to do; some rite of passage that I had to enter into and experience. I knew that I would probably feel empowered by doing something physical with my hands and body that I had never done alone before. And I thought I’d probably go on a killer hike that would take my mind to new realms of enlightenment that I couldn’t obtain at home. Instead I’m here, by my tent, awakened by birdsong, and nestled amongst the cedars next to my warm fire with the best cup of coffee I’ve had in months, writing about the epiphany that has been dawning in my consciousness for a while now, and which, just this morning fully materialized in my mind. I found myself in this serendipitous and totally unexpected meditative place. So, I’m going to forego my killer hike and write about my newfound realization instead.

I have been living on my own for about 10 months now. It has been a difficult time for me because I have had someone else to lean on for my emotional well-being since I was about 19 years old. Before that, my life was difficult too, but I endured it, and at that time I was driven subconsciously to find a man who would make me feel complete; would fill that void that I had always known, that all-pervasive loneliness that came with feeling unknown. I’m now sure this feeling isn’t unique to me; I suspect it is part of the human condition.

Now that I find myself electively alone, in this completely isolated place, to help myself cope I’ve read a lot about how to move on after a breakup. Most things state you should NOT date or jump into relationships with others, so that you can process your feelings about your relationship ending. But I see that people rarely do this. Why? Because most people, especially women, believe being alone sucks; as humans we are made to love and be near each other, work together, and live together. We also have become distant from faith-based beliefs and religion, and while some have replaced it with a robust spirituality, most have not. Not to mention our modern world promotes instant gratification and demotes patience and fortitude. I have talked with my girlfriends about the concept of waiting a year to date, and most agree that there is no real good reason to wait, while simultaneously acknowledging that it sounds like a good idea.

Therapists also counsel that you can, and should, love yourself through this trying and lonely time; that you have to learn to replace the love and acceptance you infused from others, into loving and accepting yourself. And that you should be just as happy alone as with someone else. This last part just never, ever, sank in for me. As humans who are made to be with each other, how can we be just as happy alone as we would be with another? Yes, I get that I have to love myself fully, and heal sad and needy places in myself before I can offer someone a healthy me. But where does one find the ability to love oneself in such a deep and fulfilling way? That was the part I grappled with, and I couldn’t seem to bridge that gap, and besides, I already loved myself and felt like I was pretty healthy.

Then I realized the missing piece that I didn’t read about on all those help sites, or hear in the lay public. I already have the perfect love of God, and I have never been unknown or unloved, He has always been there loving me in the most perfect way– more perfect than any man or woman could ever love me. With this knowledge that God is beside me, understanding me perfectly and loving me, I can now bridge that unfathomable gap that I could not before; that I can be truly happy alone. Because I am not alone. He is here beside me, and always has been, leading me in the most perfect way for me. I only have to understand this and listen to Him to know true happiness.

Love doesn’t just magically come from inside me, and I can’t just reach down deep and drag it up from my depths, and it doesn’t just materialize by living alone or camping alone or forcing myself to live a year without dating. It comes from God in limitless amounts. And it’s my duty, if I choose to accept and embrace it, to wrap myself up in that perfect love, and then send it back out to others.

If I had begun dating or seeing someone soon after my separation, I would not have fully and intimately understood what has been here waiting for me all along. But I also know that no amount of solitary existence is the answer either. The true key to happiness is simply God’s love, “a love which surpasses all knowledge.” ❤

Me~

I am a woman who loves the Lord, and in quietness and rest is my solitude.  I am dedicated to discerning the Word of God and His Truth, and glorifying Him by my life and doctrine.  It is my mission in life to serve Him daily and to do His complete and total will.

I have been a mom since I was 24 and a midwife since I was 26, and I feel passionately about both.  My work as a nurse is now the primary way I serve God.  I have self-published two books, both of which are related directly to the Bible and are my labor of love for my Lord, and the way I learn best about Him.

I am an intuitive thinker with a slightly autistic brain who likes to spend my time in meditation, prayer, and reading the Bible-when I am not knitting or crocheting, friending, glamping, or thinking…

I am married to God, live a solitary life, and am embracing my life as His faithful servant~

Thanks for visiting!

Dawn of a New Day

Originally posted on April 11, 2011
 

I just found this and it really speaks to me:

He set the earth on its foundations, so that it should never be moved. You covered it with the deep as with a garment; the waters stood above the mountains. At your rebuke they fled; at the sound of your thunder they took to flight. The mountains rose, the valleys sank down to the place that you appointed for them. You set a boundary that they may not pass, so that they might not again cover the earth. You make springs gush forth in the valleys; they flow between the hills; they give drink to every beast of the field; the wild donkeys quench their thirst. Beside them the birds of the heavens dwell; they sing among the branches. From your lofty abode you water the mountains; the earth is satisfied with the fruit of your work. You cause the grass to grow for the livestock and plants for man to cultivate, that he may bring forth food from the earth and wine to gladden the heart of man, oil to make his face shine and bread to strengthen man’s heart. The trees of the LORD are watered abundantly, the cedars of Lebanon that he planted. In them the birds build their nests; the stork has her home in the fir trees. The high mountains are for the wild goats; the rocks are a refuge for the rock badgers. He made the moon to mark the seasons; the sun knows its time for setting. You make darkness, and it is night, when all the beasts of the forest creep about. The young lions roar for their prey, seeking their food from God. When the sun rises, they steal away and lie down in their dens. Man goes out to his work and to his labor until the evening. O LORD, how manifold are your works! In wisdom have you made them all; the earth is full of your creatures. (Psalms 104:5-24)