It was sometime after coming to know God that I really began being rejected by the world and the people in the world. Before then satan duped me into thinking I was accepted, though I never really was; it was all a ruse to lull me into antipathy toward God. As it says in His word, the bible, He delivers us by our affliction. ~Job 36:15. And He did thus to me. My affliction had been sexual immorality in the guise of finding true and perfect love. He knew I was really seeking Him in that, so He did what He had to do to deliver me. The effect was that I found Him, but I lost most everything else.
…..Indeed I count all things loss for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord. ~Philippians 3:8
Much to my deep consternation and pain, my kids drifted away from me toward their father. This was a shock because I, not him, had devoted my life to tending their every need, physical and emotional. From natural birth, to breastfeeding, to nighttime awakening, to cooking healthy food, to homeschooling, to nursing them when they were sick, to being a stay-at-home mom. I did not hire babysitters, go on vacation without them, or practice autocratic rule with them, always acknowledging their feelings and emotions. I dug deep and turned myself inside out for them. But they abandoned me anyway.
Then, down the line, I finally met my true male earthly soul mate (God is my ultimate Soul Mate in Heaven), and just as we began falling in love, he pulled away which devastated me. Caught up by addiction and sin, he did not realize what he was doing. He was well-entrenched by the demons and his strongholds. And still does not realize it to this day. God has made it clear to mine eyes that we definitely do not fight against flesh and blood (each other), but
…against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. ~Ephesians 6:12
Even my own birth mother abandoned me. Then my adoptive mother following her. Then my step-mother was jealous of me. Not many people can claim that depth of lack of female nurturing. Satan really went out of his way to try and sabotage me from the start. I wonder why…. But I hold no animosity against any of my mothers. They are victims of the devil too.
Godly sisters and brothers in Christ ebb and flow in and out of my life. Friends come and go as well. I am actually down to 1 friend now! Though we are close, my sister is living far away from me. Why does any of this shock me, it shouldn’t. The bible guarantees that as Christ-followers we will know suffering and rejection!
In fact, everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted… ~2 Timothy 3:12
I take comfort in knowing that God has chosen me. And I am also His. In fact, I know that the more I am rejected in the world, the closer I am to God because the devil HATES those who know God. And the devil rules this world, so that makes sense. This became crystal clear for me when as a newfound Christian I was studying the bible and I realized the symbolism of the circle in the bible. I know now the circle represents the sun and the sun represents the Son, and God’s Realm.
The priestly writers of the bible embedded numbers within the text to speak a secret language only those privy to this special knowledge could see or understand. Some of this symbology is in the form of 227, which represented pi in ancient times. One day I was contemplating my childhood and that I was now a true daughter/wife of the KING, when I realized that the phone number of my childhood home conflated to 227: (713) 488-5119. When you break it down, it equates to 11>2, 20>2, 16>7 The chances of that number occurring in exactly that order are extremely rare. What this tells me is that I always belonged to God and that He was watching over us even back them. He sent my life-force down from Heaven and I became a girl whose whole mission was and is to serve Him. I have a special purpose and mission He wants me to fulfill, as we all do! I know that is my reason for being.
So the world can reject me. Family can reject me. My soul mate can reject me. Friends can reject me. But this all just pushes me closer and closer to God. I trust that He cares about EVERY detail in our lives, no matter how seemingly small. If He is whittling me down to being a solitary, there must be a reason for it. I want to get to work! More than ever, I don’t have time or interest in social niceties. Being liked is not my mission. He has given me so much energy to focus on achieving goals set before me. He keeps telling me to continue building my ark. So I will. With an ever-watchful eye toward His call.
If you relate to this, you might be His chosen one too. ❤
~Song of Mary~ 