We are born into water, the elixir of life. I was taught how to swim at a very young age and I always loved the water: rivers, pools, lakes, springs, and the ocean. I found it fun to float atop the waves and to dive deep into the density. It was always different and new, always some excitement to be found there. A feeling you could get no where else.
I realize I have lived my life figuratively on the water. No real foundation below me; heading out into the water to see what adventure I could have. Swimming and frolicking with others like me who craved the unknown. Coming to shore long enough to catch my breath and decide where I was heading next. Following the next big wave or winding river into the unexplored.
But when I found God He began pushing me inward, toward dry land. I fought to go deeper, to head out into the great beyond where I thought He was, to the others who beckoned to me from there. Those who had what I wanted and who could show me places wanted to go. Yet I remained evermore in the surf. That part of the ocean that is relentlessly battering against you and pushing you down. I would get up again and try a new tack to get out beyond the surf. Maybe this time I would succeed! Over and over and over again. In childhood, in adolescence, in young adulthood, in adulthood, in mid-life. I am battle worn and weary now, from fighting the waves. I cannot fight God anymore as He pushes me homeward toward dry land.
So instead of going back out to sea, I am going to follow Jesus. I am going to leave the water and become a fisher of men. Those in the water are not my family anymore, and they will soon drift out into the eternal sunset, on their destiny that only God knows.
I am going to finally let Him push me onto the shore. I am going to use my last bit of strength and grit to drag myself up onto the beach until no part of me touches the water. I am going to flip over exhaustively and bask in the sunshine I know He will shine down on me. I am going to rest. My waterlogged skin is going to dry. I am going to be more alone than I ever was (for a while). Then I am going to look up and behind me and see a sea of other folks just like me taking refuge on the land He provided; all of us being born not of water, but of the Spirit.
And I am going to join them and together we will become a new family in our Lord GOD.
Praise You Almighty Father for pushing me home.
~Song of Mary~ 